days go by

Inside my mind...
A place to document my day...
Come, join me.

Happy October! Good bye summer although it’s still pretty warm here. But summer’s lost its grip and I’m glad. Ready for porch time, tinkling chimes, falling leaves, and sweatshirts! (and Christmas…yes, I said it!) 🎄🎁🎄

Why is there always one or two everywhere you go? Nurses who are determined to make life miserable. I know, I know: ignore them, don’t let them get to you, you are in control of how you feel, not them. But really?? I am so over mean spirited, negative co-workers I could scream. 

Right now, my husband and I are both dealing with negative nurses. His is a charge nurse who seems to hate men and treats him like an idiot every chance she gets. Mine is a snake in the grass who seems determined to convince me that she’s the boss of me although she’s not. She never missed a chance to tell me my online degree will be worthless. Negativity just pours out every time she opens her mouth. 

I’m really tired of these people! And how do they keep their jobs? Why is there such a huge disconnect between annual performance evaluations and what is really going on out there?? I’m so tired of: “Oh, that’s just how she is..” Really? She’s a mean b***h, a bully, a negative nelly sucking every molecule of happiness out of the room? Well if you know that, then tell her GOOD-BYE! Give her the opportunity to meet new people and visit new locations when she has to go find a new job. 

Why? Why is there always at least one in every crowd?? End of soapbox (for now).

Why is there always one or two everywhere you go? Nurses who are determined to make life miserable. I know, I know: ignore them, don’t let them get to you, you are in control of how you feel, not them. But really?? I am so over mean spirited, negative co-workers I could scream.

Right now, my husband and I are both dealing with negative nurses. His is a charge nurse who seems to hate men and treats him like an idiot every chance she gets. Mine is a snake in the grass who seems determined to convince me that she’s the boss of me although she’s not. She never missed a chance to tell me my online degree will be worthless. Negativity just pours out every time she opens her mouth.

I’m really tired of these people! And how do they keep their jobs? Why is there such a huge disconnect between annual performance evaluations and what is really going on out there?? I’m so tired of: “Oh, that’s just how she is..” Really? She’s a mean b***h, a bully, a negative nelly sucking every molecule of happiness out of the room? Well if you know that, then tell her GOOD-BYE! Give her the opportunity to meet new people and visit new locations when she has to go find a new job.

Why? Why is there always at least one in every crowd?? End of soapbox (for now).

This week’s class discussion posts have made me kinda blue. Did you know there are hospitals out there that really value their nurses? I know!!?? Crazy, right?  Then why so blue?  I don’t think I’ve ever worked at one that truly cared. That’s so sad. Maybe before I retire! One can dream.

This week’s class discussion posts have made me kinda blue. Did you know there are hospitals out there that really value their nurses? I know!!?? Crazy, right? Then why so blue? I don’t think I’ve ever worked at one that truly cared. That’s so sad. Maybe before I retire! One can dream.

I don’t even like the whole “keep calm and…whatever” craze but this one applies. Ya know what surprises me these days? People who actually do what they say they’ll do. 

I’ve had more than a few experiences lately with people who say they’ll do something or they’ll fix me up to do something or whatever and guess what? They didn’t…and they didn’t even bother to explain much less apologize. 

So go ahead, surprise me. Do what you say you’ll do and I will be properly amazed! Good luck!

I don’t even like the whole “keep calm and…whatever” craze but this one applies. Ya know what surprises me these days? People who actually do what they say they’ll do.

I’ve had more than a few experiences lately with people who say they’ll do something or they’ll fix me up to do something or whatever and guess what? They didn’t…and they didn’t even bother to explain much less apologize.

So go ahead, surprise me. Do what you say you’ll do and I will be properly amazed! Good luck!

Aaaah, porch time. Sigh, it has been a long two or three weeks. I thought this week would be, too, but the gameplan changed and I’m gonna actually be off the rest of the week. Hooray! I was beginning to think they forgot I am PRN.

So now a relaxing evening and then back to the books. So much to do as Week 4 of 11 begins. The end is in sight!

This is going to be a crazy week!  I have two shifts in Cardiac Rehab, I have to make six educational presentations at work in one week, and I have class with my practicum preceptor as well as all of my usual coursework.  But I am maintaining a positive attitude and I have carefully planned the week.  I have so much to do that I have a weekly calendar taped above my regular calendar. 
The weather has changed and it is THAT time of year! Sunny, breezy, and cool! Perfect! Another blessing. 
I am learning so much and it is very exciting.  The various pieces of the past two years are coming together and I am starting to feel the beginnings of what it will be like to be a teacher. I have not let the cackling hen party of the other night influence me at all.  Life is so much easier when I don’t let other people determine how I feel. 
Moving along.  Life is very exciting right now! YAY me :)

This is going to be a crazy week!  I have two shifts in Cardiac Rehab, I have to make six educational presentations at work in one week, and I have class with my practicum preceptor as well as all of my usual coursework.  But I am maintaining a positive attitude and I have carefully planned the week.  I have so much to do that I have a weekly calendar taped above my regular calendar. 

The weather has changed and it is THAT time of year! Sunny, breezy, and cool! Perfect! Another blessing. 

I am learning so much and it is very exciting.  The various pieces of the past two years are coming together and I am starting to feel the beginnings of what it will be like to be a teacher. I have not let the cackling hen party of the other night influence me at all.  Life is so much easier when I don’t let other people determine how I feel. 

Moving along.  Life is very exciting right now! YAY me :)

I believe this is a great depiction of my philosophy of teaching. I want to help my students fly!  It’s so exciting and I won’t let cackling negativity blur my vision!

I will be a teacher!

I believe this is a great depiction of my philosophy of teaching. I want to help my students fly! It’s so exciting and I won’t let cackling negativity blur my vision!

I will be a teacher!

Wow! I had my conference call this evening between myself, my practicum site preceptor, and my course instructor.  Wow (yes, I meant to say that again)! I was tremendously let down in so many ways.  My preceptor reviewed my practicum learning objectives last week and said they were great. Tonight when my course instructor began to dissect them, the preceptor jumped right on the train.  They both laughed, saying I “wanted to change the world in 11 weeks” and critiqued my objectives as overwritten, wordy, and impossible to achieve. The course instructor tore them apart one by one and they agreed that students just didn’t “get it”. 
Next, the course instructor described the mountains of paperwork to be completed for the class and then laughed, saying, “Welcome to grad school!”  Really?  Nothing about grad school surprises me…I am nearing the end, not just beginning.  Then they both had a big laugh about how I just didn’t know what I was facing.  The instructor was coarse, borderline rude, and my preceptor…well, I was shocked most by her behavior.  Last week, she sang my praises (I even commented on her compliments in my practicum journal).  I honestly believe if the course instructor had approved my learning objectives, the preceptor would have continued to sing praises, as well.  
Coincidentally, our discussion topic next week is incivility and bullying in nursing education.  While I don’t think they rose to bullying, they were very cliqueish, cackling, and less than supportive.  They had an “us versus you” kinda attitude which really made me feel bad.  Too bad they don’t practice what they preach.  Too bad they are not true leaders who support and mentor graduate students who are nearing the end of their coursework.  
I can only pray that I will never role model either of their behaviors and hope they were just having a bad night.  The instructor kept complaining that this was not her “full-time” job.  Yeah, I noticed. I would be ashamed to ever treat one of my students in such a shabby manner.  And how will I ever trust my preceptor again?  I will be so glad when this is over.

Wow! I had my conference call this evening between myself, my practicum site preceptor, and my course instructor.  Wow (yes, I meant to say that again)! I was tremendously let down in so many ways.  My preceptor reviewed my practicum learning objectives last week and said they were great. Tonight when my course instructor began to dissect them, the preceptor jumped right on the train.  They both laughed, saying I “wanted to change the world in 11 weeks” and critiqued my objectives as overwritten, wordy, and impossible to achieve. The course instructor tore them apart one by one and they agreed that students just didn’t “get it”. 

Next, the course instructor described the mountains of paperwork to be completed for the class and then laughed, saying, “Welcome to grad school!”  Really?  Nothing about grad school surprises me…I am nearing the end, not just beginning.  Then they both had a big laugh about how I just didn’t know what I was facing.  The instructor was coarse, borderline rude, and my preceptor…well, I was shocked most by her behavior.  Last week, she sang my praises (I even commented on her compliments in my practicum journal).  I honestly believe if the course instructor had approved my learning objectives, the preceptor would have continued to sing praises, as well.  

Coincidentally, our discussion topic next week is incivility and bullying in nursing education.  While I don’t think they rose to bullying, they were very cliqueish, cackling, and less than supportive.  They had an “us versus you” kinda attitude which really made me feel bad.  Too bad they don’t practice what they preach.  Too bad they are not true leaders who support and mentor graduate students who are nearing the end of their coursework.  

I can only pray that I will never role model either of their behaviors and hope they were just having a bad night.  The instructor kept complaining that this was not her “full-time” job.  Yeah, I noticed. I would be ashamed to ever treat one of my students in such a shabby manner.  And how will I ever trust my preceptor again?  I will be so glad when this is over.

I feel autumn in the air. We had a few days of nice weather, but today was hot again. Still, I think summer has lost its grip. Maybe a few days of Indian summer to come but the oppressive heat and humidity seem to be moving out. 

Today, as I studied, I looked out the window and watched bright yellow leaves rain down from a walnut tree. Now that’s relaxation! I’ve been meditating on scripture lately and I find it so comforting. Life is just wild with school and practicums and projects and work…moments of relaxation and meditation are welcome. 

So let the “pumpkin-flavored everything” season begin. I’m ready for chili, hoodies, more falling leaves, the colors, the football games, flannel sheets. Fall brings the lovely colors to summer’s monochromatic canopies of green, painting the landscape in red, yellow, and orange. I’m ready for the changes and life continues on.

I feel autumn in the air. We had a few days of nice weather, but today was hot again. Still, I think summer has lost its grip. Maybe a few days of Indian summer to come but the oppressive heat and humidity seem to be moving out.

Today, as I studied, I looked out the window and watched bright yellow leaves rain down from a walnut tree. Now that’s relaxation! I’ve been meditating on scripture lately and I find it so comforting. Life is just wild with school and practicums and projects and work…moments of relaxation and meditation are welcome.

So let the “pumpkin-flavored everything” season begin. I’m ready for chili, hoodies, more falling leaves, the colors, the football games, flannel sheets. Fall brings the lovely colors to summer’s monochromatic canopies of green, painting the landscape in red, yellow, and orange. I’m ready for the changes and life continues on.

Today was the first day of my practicum! So many feelings and emotions were stirred up. I kept daydreaming about the early 1980’s, when I was a nursing student, and it was me, and Kelly, and Denise, and we were such new baby nurses!  Plus I was totally interested in the university vibe today which really surprised me! I’ve never seen myself in the academia setting. 

I truly have no clue what I will do with my degree but I’m opening up to more avenues than ever. I LOVE my preceptor! This practicum is gonna be so exciting! Now if I can just keep my head above water because the workload is astounding. I guess we have to prove to them that we’ve got it… I hope I’ve got it. Stay tuned!

Today was the first day of my practicum! So many feelings and emotions were stirred up. I kept daydreaming about the early 1980’s, when I was a nursing student, and it was me, and Kelly, and Denise, and we were such new baby nurses! Plus I was totally interested in the university vibe today which really surprised me! I’ve never seen myself in the academia setting.

I truly have no clue what I will do with my degree but I’m opening up to more avenues than ever. I LOVE my preceptor! This practicum is gonna be so exciting! Now if I can just keep my head above water because the workload is astounding. I guess we have to prove to them that we’ve got it… I hope I’ve got it. Stay tuned!